I don’t remember the last time I felt like singing, or the last time I actually appreciated and cherished and lived my days. Quite an eye opener these last 5 days have been for me.
After working 7 days in a row, it took almost 3 days off for me to recover and feel whole again. After another two days off, my inner me decided to peak out. I didn’t even realize she was hiding. That’s how consumed with work and my commute I have been.
Most times, on my day off, I laze around in my sweats and a hat all day. It’s sad when I can’t even get up the gumption to shower. But this week, I have actually dressed up to go out – you know, in jeans and a nice sweater, and washed hair! I met an old friend for breakfast, I met with they eye doctor about my own eyes, and I drove Link to his eye doctor appointment. I felt human. What an incredible feeling!
Along with that, I baked a few items, whipped up some chicken and cheesy potatoes for suppers, dusted and vacuumed the house, did a few loads of laundry…. all without stress!
The realization that I have an overwhelming job, really hit me yesterday. As I was waiting for Link to see his doctor, I got a call from my hubby. I explained to him that he hadn’t been seen yet. We’d been there for 2 hours, but had been assured that it wouldn’t be much longer. I’d brought my stack of magazines to catch up on, and my resume to edit, so I wasn’t concerned one bit. My hubby was though. “Isn’t it crazy that we spend our entire lives doing this kind of stuff…” meaning driving the kids, waiting around, driving them back…. and my response?
“I don’t spend my time doing this. I spend my time working.”
It quieted us both for a second.
This is the kind of stuff I should be doing. I should be taking care of the kids, and driving them around, and being there for them. That doesn’t mean I can’t work, it just means I shouldn’t have a job that is so consuming of me that I have nothing left to give. Especially if I’m not getting the pay and respect that I deserve.
That’s why it’s a beautiful morning! I go back to work tonight, but the sun’s shining. It’s a brisk 38 degrees. I ran 8.5 miles, and could have run more…
and I have hope…. and a lighter heart…. and a good feeling about the direction I am heading.