I’d like to make this post all about me. And how flippin’ sick I’ve been for the past week. And how it’s made me do uncharacteristic things like skip my ice cream treat. And skip my coffee this morning. And drink a bottle of orange juice. (yeah – I never drink juice) And sleep while it’s still light out. And go a day without turning my computer on. And I haven’t run or exercised since before this gawdawful bug took control. And if that’s not bad enough, I think the flu bug invited a virus or two in for a visit. ‘Cause now my sinuses are poundin’, and my throat is sore and hoarse, and I’m. Just. A Mess.
I’d rather this post be about my hubby and his dad. So I’ll quit whining about myself.
For the past few months, my hubby has spent a tremendous amount of time taking care of his parents, especially his dad. Because we live in the same town, he is called first whenever anything is needed. And because he works from home, he’s viewed as the one who has the time because the other siblings have to work.
So over and over again he would drop what he was doing and unselfishly take care of whatever they needed. He’d mumble a bit to me about it, but whenever he’d return he always had some funny story about his dad. I sensed he enjoyed spending more time with his dad, but it’s still difficult to be interrupted when he is trying to get a business off the ground.
On one of his last trips to the hospital, the docs mentioned having hospice come in. It was a hard conversation to have, but Dad and hubby seemed to accept it. Once in the car, they drove silently for a while. When Hubby broke the silence and asked him what he was thinking, his Dad said quietly. “I think I want one of them gyros from Dairy King.”
With as sick as his Dad’s been lately, he still enjoys his treats – whether it be White Castle burgers, or McDonald’s Cherry Berry Chillers, or Dairy King’s gyros, or Hostess Cherry pies.
When Hubby was told by the Hospice nurses that Dad had only a few days left to live, but would require round the clock care, it was an easy decision for him. He would be the one to provide the care. He came home, packed a few things, and headed back to his dad’s. The nurses taught him how to roll him over, clean him, change him, swab his mouth, etc. They left that evening, and hubby settled in for the night.
Throughout the night, whenever Dad awoke, Hubby would swab his mouth and hold his hand. Around 4 am, Hubby noticed his breaths coming further and further apart. He woke his mom, and together they sat with him while his dad took his final breath.
He passed away very early New Year’s Day morning.
I am so proud of my husband. Not many people could have been so nurturing. He was rewarded by being able to say goodbye to his dad, and he’s left with the knowledge that he did everything he could to make his dad’s final days a little easier.
My father in law will be missed tremendously. He was a caring, generous, hard-working man. And he obviously did a great job raising his son.
They are both at peace.