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Bittersweet

13 May

That’s how my Mother’s Day was.

And in light of everything that’s been going on these last few weeks, I’m okay with that.

My mother-in-law passed away the night before with my hubby and his siblings at her side.  In a way, we’re feeling a great sense of relief. She’s had a rough couple of weeks, and it’s been mentally and physically exhausting for the family, my husband especially.

I was working at the time, and by the time I arrived home, my hubby was just pulling in.  He had his pillow and overnight bag, and I knew he was finally coming home to stay.

It was a great feeling knowing things were going back to normal, but of course that meant a chapter in our life was now over.  Losing one parent is hard.  Losing the second creates an overwhelming sense of finality.

Hubby and I allowed ourselves a good cry while he talked about some childhood toys they found while digging for Rose’s rosary.  She had kept them all these years knowing the kids would find them after she was gone.  She had left a little note with them explaining why she’d boxed them up and didn’t want the grandkids to play with them.  Memories came rushing back for each of them when they saw the long forgotten cartoon characters they used to interact with.

We awoke early on Mother’s Day.  I went for a much needed run before heading to the funeral home to make the arrangements for her funeral.  Having just gone through the process with Hubby’s dad, today’s meeting went very smoothly and quickly.

As the three siblings went back to the house to look for pictures for the boards, I went home to mow the lawn.  And for the first time this spring, it was NOT  a fight!  Happy Mother’s Day to me!

I came in afterwards to find 4 bags of Blow Pops from the kids.  They know me well.  As I read through their cards, my eyes filled up with tears.  I tried not to let them overflow as I was afraid another waterfall would start.  (I’d had another good cry after breaking the news to Chip.  He was devastated since he had planned to visit her today, and had even bought her a card.  Seeing your 18 year old son feeling so sad is heartbreaking!) But their expressions of thankfulness for everything I do was almost too much for me to bear today.  They each gave me a warm, strong hug – something I’ve definitely been needing.  I’m sensing they needed it too.

The rest of the day was spent relaxing with my hubby.  The sun was out, making for a beautiful day, although a little too chilly to just sit on the deck.  We enjoyed a nice, leisurely walk, however.

I ended the day with a bowl of ice cream, a Blow Pop, and Cupcake Wars on TV, with fleeting thoughts of a woman who meant more to me than she’ll ever know.

In Memory of Ros

In Memory of Rose

A bittersweet Mother’s Day for sure.

 

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12 Comments

Posted by on May 13, 2013 in Family, Holidays

 

Tags: , ,

12 responses to “Bittersweet

  1. Sandi

    May 13, 2013 at 1:29 am

    I am so glad you got all those hugs, you deserve them. My thoughts are with you.

     
    • shadowrun300

      May 13, 2013 at 1:37 am

      Thank you, Sandi! My teenage boys don’t show emotion well, but today we were all feeling the need for a hug.

       
  2. agg79

    May 13, 2013 at 1:56 am

    I am so sorry for the loss of your mother-in-law. I know how hard your husband worked to comfort her in her final days and it made a difference. Your gift of oatmeal cream pies earlier really shows how much you loved and cared for her when she needed it the most. You deserve all the hugs and blow pops and ice cream. Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

     
    • shadowrun300

      May 14, 2013 at 1:29 pm

      Thank you, Agg. It’s been a difficult few weeks. We’re torn between relief and sadness. It seems so much harder this time around. Thank you for thinking of us. I think of you all often too. These are tough times.

       
  3. Abby

    May 13, 2013 at 2:06 am

    Bittersweet indeed. I had a feeling this news was coming any day. I’m so sorry, but I’m glad that her kids were with her when she passed. And how sweet that she saved those toys. I’m sure it’s tough on your kids, and glad that you’re all together for hugs and sweet things on Mother’s Day.

     
    • shadowrun300

      May 14, 2013 at 1:33 pm

      For the last week, we’ve been thinking today’s the day… but she would continue to hang on. Quite draining actually. But when the day really DID come, the grief was overwhelming.
      The toy-saving just showed how much she loved her children and what a great mother and grandmother she was. We’ll miss her.

       
  4. Rock Chef

    May 13, 2013 at 12:22 pm

    Sorry to hear about this, but it sounds like things were as good as they can be at a time like this.

    I guess that CAT! is having to readapt again? Unless he is really attached to you now…

    Thinking of you.

     
    • shadowrun300

      May 14, 2013 at 1:37 pm

      You know… that’s very true. Things were as good as they could be, considering. And we take comfort in knowing she’s with Fred once again. They’d been together since childhood.
      CAT! has settled back nicely on Hubby’s lap once again, and leaves me alone except for feedings and the occasional sink drink. I haven’t had to pet him in a few days, lol, and he no longer sleeps on my pillow. He sleeps between us instead.

       
  5. meleah rebeccah

    May 13, 2013 at 6:59 pm

    I am so sorry to hear about the passing of your mother in law. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. You have my deepest sympathies.

     
    • shadowrun300

      May 14, 2013 at 1:41 pm

      Thank you, Meleah. I know you know how difficult this is. I’m sure you had the same bittersweet feelings with Poppa Sye – wanting peace for him, but feeling incredible sadness after.

       
  6. territerri

    May 14, 2013 at 12:46 am

    I’m so sorry for the loss of your mother in law. I know how difficult these past few weeks and months have been for your hubby and you.

    What a thoughtful thing for your MIL to do, leaving toys and memories for her kids. She was thinking of them and loving them right up until her last days.

    I’m glad you could find some time for you and ways to enjoy your family on such a bittersweet Mother’s Day.

     
    • shadowrun300

      May 14, 2013 at 1:47 pm

      She was an incredibly thoughtful woman, and was a terrific mother and grandmother – always doing things for others. I couldn’t have asked for a better mother-in-law.
      And she obviously did a great job raising her children….

       

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