Bittersweet

That’s how my Mother’s Day was.

And in light of everything that’s been going on these last few weeks, I’m okay with that.

My mother-in-law passed away the night before with my hubby and his siblings at her side.  In a way, we’re feeling a great sense of relief. She’s had a rough couple of weeks, and it’s been mentally and physically exhausting for the family, my husband especially.

I was working at the time, and by the time I arrived home, my hubby was just pulling in.  He had his pillow and overnight bag, and I knew he was finally coming home to stay.

It was a great feeling knowing things were going back to normal, but of course that meant a chapter in our life was now over.  Losing one parent is hard.  Losing the second creates an overwhelming sense of finality.

Hubby and I allowed ourselves a good cry while he talked about some childhood toys they found while digging for Rose’s rosary.  She had kept them all these years knowing the kids would find them after she was gone.  She had left a little note with them explaining why she’d boxed them up and didn’t want the grandkids to play with them.  Memories came rushing back for each of them when they saw the long forgotten cartoon characters they used to interact with.

We awoke early on Mother’s Day.  I went for a much needed run before heading to the funeral home to make the arrangements for her funeral.  Having just gone through the process with Hubby’s dad, today’s meeting went very smoothly and quickly.

As the three siblings went back to the house to look for pictures for the boards, I went home to mow the lawn.  And for the first time this spring, it was NOT  a fight!  Happy Mother’s Day to me!

I came in afterwards to find 4 bags of Blow Pops from the kids.  They know me well.  As I read through their cards, my eyes filled up with tears.  I tried not to let them overflow as I was afraid another waterfall would start.  (I’d had another good cry after breaking the news to Chip.  He was devastated since he had planned to visit her today, and had even bought her a card.  Seeing your 18 year old son feeling so sad is heartbreaking!) But their expressions of thankfulness for everything I do was almost too much for me to bear today.  They each gave me a warm, strong hug – something I’ve definitely been needing.  I’m sensing they needed it too.

The rest of the day was spent relaxing with my hubby.  The sun was out, making for a beautiful day, although a little too chilly to just sit on the deck.  We enjoyed a nice, leisurely walk, however.

I ended the day with a bowl of ice cream, a Blow Pop, and Cupcake Wars on TV, with fleeting thoughts of a woman who meant more to me than she’ll ever know.

In Memory of Rose

A bittersweet Mother’s Day for sure.