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The straw that broke me

07 May

Not much has changed since my last pitiful post.  I’m working daily.  And my daily work consists of 8-10 hours of nonstop giving of myself.  I’m giving to my guests, I’m giving to my co-workers, and I’m especially giving to my new trainee.

I’ve worked with her for a week now, and she’s like two year old.  I can’t leave her alone for a second for fear of what she’ll say or do.  I thought I was exhausted before, but sheesh!  This lady is work!

I came home yesterday and crashed.  I woke an hour later still exhausted and decided I should just head to the couch earlier than usual.

My stress had yet to subside when Mario came out.  “Ummm…. my friend Brett wants to know if I can go with him to his friend’s house to play video games.”

“You don’t have to take me,” she rushed on.  “His friend can come get me and bring me home.”

My blood pressure sky rocketed even higher.  No part of me felt right about letting my 15 year old daughter get in a car with a 17 year old male, even if he was a friend of Brett’s.  But I knew telling her no would be a huge disappointment.

We debated back and forth for a while.  I voiced my concerns.  She said she’d be home by 9:30 and they weren’t going far.  I tried to decide if I was being illogical because I was tired and because we’d witnessed a wreck the night before, or if my feelings were legit. The pressure was too much, so I called my hubby.

Luckily, he was close to home.  I let him make the decision.  He thought it would be alright and agreed to wait up for her.  Mario agreed to keep in touch with him throughout the night.

Suddenly tears began rolling down my face.  I was relieved to have Hubby back home after being gone a few days.  The pressures of making sure the kids were okay along with the pressures of work were too much.  I was exhausted, sick, and just wanted to cry.

So I did.

I awoke with puffy eyes and a stuffier nose, but with a little less stress.

stressed

This week looks to be easier for me.  I’m on day 6 of 8, after only having one day off, but I’ve hooked up my difficult trainee with another desk agent.  Let her babysit for a while, so all I have to do is work.

relief

 

My gosh.  I think it worked

 

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14 Comments

Posted by on May 7, 2014 in Everyday Living, Family, The Hotel

 

Tags: , , ,

14 responses to “The straw that broke me

  1. agg79

    May 7, 2014 at 10:47 am

    Sometimes everyone needs to go a little postal to keep yourself sane. I am surprised you kept it bottled up so well for so long. I’m thinking some serious time off getting lost with the Shadow might help. Either that or a long run – that always seems to help me from tearing somebody’s head off (not good a good career move). Those seem to be better alternatives than drinking yourself into a coma. You definitely need a break. Hope the upcoming weekend gives that to you.

     
    • shadowrun300

      May 8, 2014 at 3:50 am

      I definitely need some time off. One more day and my 8 day stretch will be over. I’ve tried running, but I am so exhausted mentally and physically that it’s seems like work. It’s also the reason I’m afraid to take my Shadow out… I have to be totally aware when riding and right now, I’m so scatterbrained that it’s not a good idea.
      Wow. I’m hosting my own pity party here. It’s gonna get better. It really is….

       
  2. Abby

    May 7, 2014 at 3:23 pm

    Gosh, I was reading this and feeling your pain and then came the Ryan Gosling therapy. What was I gonna say??
    Anyway, I hope things have calmed down both in your inner and outer worlds. You can only juggle so much!

     
    • shadowrun300

      May 8, 2014 at 3:55 am

      I know, right? How can you top Ryan’s eye therapy?
      I have surpassed my juggling capacity, and the effects are beginning to show. One more day. ONE. MORE. DAY. I can make it.

       
  3. The Thin Lady Inside

    May 9, 2014 at 3:51 am

    Aw! I am so sorry! I am sending you big hugs! I am so happy you have such a great hubby by you! 🙂 Yes… thank God for the great relief of counting on them! 🙂 … I hope your days get better soon! xoxo

     
    • shadowrun300

      May 9, 2014 at 5:17 am

      We’re ALL hoping my days get better soon.
      I am off on Friday and Saturday, and hope I get plenty of rest and stress relief. But if I know myself at all, I won’t be able to take it TOO easy. Either way, I’ll be getting a break from work. Much needed after these last three weeks!

       
  4. llcooljoe

    May 10, 2014 at 6:46 am

    Okay I interested to know why women love Ryan Gosling so much? And I’m sure many men do too, but he does seem to appeal to women more. 😀

    So did Mario arrive home safely and on time?

     
    • shadowrun300

      May 11, 2014 at 1:02 am

      It’s not obvious? 😉
      Mario arrived home safely, and I’m assuming on time. I was in bed long before her curfew.

       
  5. territerri

    May 10, 2014 at 2:08 pm

    Geeze, I wish I lived closer. I’m not exactly sure how that would help unless it meant I was taking on a job at your hotel and being a rock star desk agent (which I totally would be) and relieving some of your work stress. Otherwise, I would take you out for a drink and some girlfriend therapy and at least make you take a load off for a while.

    You have good kids. Let yourself trust them a little bit and know they’ll make good decisions. But I know it’s hard not to worry and to always know when it’s okay to say yes. I’m glad your hubby helped out a bit with Mario’s situation.

    Hope you get some relief soon! And it’s totally okay to cry now and then. Been there myself.

     
    • shadowrun300

      May 11, 2014 at 1:07 am

      You WOULD be a rock star desk agent. But then there would be two of us stressed out. Drinks and girlfriend therapy sounds fantastic…. maybe someday.
      I know Mario is a good kid. My biggest concern was her riding with a teenage driver I didn’t know, and as stressed as I was, I didn’t want one more thing to worry about. Since my hubby took on the worry, (ha, doubt it…), I could rest easy. Although I still cried myself to sleep.
      Sometimes you just need a good cry.

       
  6. Rock Chef

    May 13, 2014 at 2:16 pm

    I think your kids are very sensible and will have made a good choice of friends.

    A couple of weeks ago I got to a stage where I was so tired I was annoying myself…

    Hope you get some let up soon!

     
    • shadowrun300

      May 14, 2014 at 3:23 am

      That’s what she said too. And I believe her. I was just tired and overly stressed. Hubby was able to make a more rational decision.
      Things are getting back to normal busy instead of crazy busy. Whew.

       
  7. The Thin Lady Inside

    May 13, 2014 at 9:04 pm

    Just stopping by to check on you… You’ve checked on me so many times when I’ve needed you the most that I think it’s only appropriate for me to do the same… how are you feeling?

     
    • shadowrun300

      May 14, 2014 at 3:25 am

      Aww! Thank you TLI. I’m doing better – not as sick, a little less stressed, but finding it difficult to finish a post. Hope to have another up soon. 🙂

       

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